a-supposed-hair-makeover

Fashion disaster or hair makeover turn disaster can happen to anyone. Trust me on this.

Take for example actors or actresses. They love to change their hair do. Some of them made it well into the gossip headline, others got the fashion police slapping on their face in front of national television. Well, if I thought that I could escape the fate just because I am not an artist, I am surely perfectly wrong!

It happened couple week ago when I felt like the time for another hair cut has come. I had lived with this hair style for over 6 months. So, I guess a fresh cut will do. Plus another straight perm after that. So, I came to local famous hair salon in a hope for better style. But my oh my.. don’t judge the salon for its fame. I came out of the salon feeling no good and all the people who met me that day asked what’s wrong with my hair. I feel so bad the whole day. Then my mom offered me a kind help. Fix my hair a bit. So, I got a second cut of the day.

Still, I felt so bad every time I looked at my self in the mirror. I kept asking two of my friends who came with me for a vacation how did my hair look. I guess I kept nagging them on that one particular question that has a magnitude of atom missile to eliminate all their patient.

Then, all of a sudden, when I asked Haruka how’s my hair for I had no idea how many times already, she finally said
“What’s important is your smile, Nurul. It doesn’t matter what hair do you have, good or bad. All you need to do is smiling and its all okay”.

I startled when she said that. Then I realize how true that word is. Yes, it is not my hair that matter. What matter is whether I keep my smile or not. Cause when we smile, the world could smile too. I hugged Haruka and thanked her for the best advice she just gave me. I smile, not because of my hair, but because I know I am lucky to have Haruka as my friend. Since that day, I started to like my hair no matter what. Then, I found how to live with it, in its new style.

originally written on March 16, 2009

wishing upon a shooting star

There is an old saying that said "Just wish upon a shooting star, and your dream will come true"

aaaaahh...how easy it could be... ^_^
Just wish upon a shooting star, and taraaanggg!!! your dream is there for you to enjoy. But, that was never been the case. Sometimes, our dream didn't made it into reality, just like some of our past actually never made it into the future. But, our dream can really do come true, only if we dare to fight for it and believe it.. Just have faith in our dream and in ourself..

Yet, we love to see shooting star. Make wish upon see one. Like what I did tonight with Kisi, Nancy and Gil. In the middle of freezing night, we stand in front of a shrine to see the shooting stars. And it came....not in form of meteor shower. But it just drop one after another. And it was sooo fast. It appeared as fast as it disappeared. Likewise, we still stand there. Wait for another one to come and made secret wishes.. Feels soo happy. And we plan to see another one tomorrow. I hope its not cloudy as weather reports says. Coz the big moment actually will come tomorrow from 8 to 2 am. So, anyone who live in Kyoto and appeared to read my notes, we can see the meteor shower tomorrow..

Yeaapp.. can't wait for tomorrow to come. To see the full moon again, to see the clear sky again, to see the orion's belt again and for sure, the shooting star..

Ok then! I should prepare wishes list tonight. Just to make sure I won't forget wishes ;P

Originally written on December 13, 2008

Its time for Indonesian music

ndonesian songs never actually been my favorite. My iPod usually is dominated with Korean, Chinese or Japan music. Especially Japanese songs when I was about to depart to Kyoto for school. But since I landed my feet here, I just want to listen to Indonesian songs, over and over again. I have to admit that some Japanese songs were really stuck in my head during my first two months in Kyoto. Yet now! I can't help not you scroll my fingers in youtube to listen to Indonesian songs, new one. And I found that some of them are really good, something that I never openly admit before. Like what my friends did the other day, we just listen or download them when we get really bored.

Perhaps, I always take Indonesian music for granted. When I was at home, I could listen to it every single day. I didn't have to go to youtube to listen to it. All i need to do was just turn my tv on at 9.00 in the morning, and there were 2 music programs live. Or turned my radio before i sleep, and I could listen to some oldies ones. But here, in Japan, I cannot do that. Suddenly, I miss all of that. I miss listen to music that I can understand in an instant. A music sang in my mother tongue. A music that can moved my heart and my mind without taking any effort to translate them. A music that has been with me for so long, a good friend that never ask for more. The one that I take for granted. And when I loose it, I miss it so much coz I finally realize how precious it was. Thanks God that it is Indonesian music. I can reach it back, bring it back into my life. An easy one..

I realize that we, human, probably take so many things for granted as well. Like myself, probably, I never realize what that things were until I lost it. And usually, it is so precious that we cannot ask any technology to help us bring it back. I hope I can be smart enough to realize that precious things, cherish it while i have it. I am happy though, I have found one. It called friendship.. A friendship that complete me, my comfort zone

Originally written on december 4, 2008

Home is where good friends and food are

there is an old quotation in indonesia. it says `win your beloved one`s love with food`. lets make it simple.. from food with love! waakakakakakaka... well, as I realize that this come from someone who loves food soo muuuccch... you can believe it. But you are very much welcome not to ;p

Me, very much lucky today to have full lunch and dinner with Indonesian food. Oh God... I really feel like home. Pak Cahyo is celebrating his brithday and Pak Agus just set his foot back to this city, a home to Japan`s most beautiful ladies - one said. Yaaaayyy... so happy. Plus when we had dance rehearsal, we had Indonesian snack. Yeepppyyy... Oh, how much food can make us happy, ne? hahahahahhaa....

What make me happy is that we share so many good jokes tonight. Pak Agus told us, that once he had a discussion with friends who studies at Rits School of Policy Science. Not long after that, a friend came along the discussion and asked what they were talking about. Pak Agus, who seems to have the jokes of all, said that they just talked about Rits Graduate School of Policy Sciences. Pak Agus said that they were talking about POLISI. In Indonesian word, POLISI means police officer. Soo ... when you said the word `policy` in indonesian, you can mistaken it for polisi. in suuumm... Rits Graduate School for Policy Science is a school for police officer ;p

have a nice weekend, everybody ^_^

originally written on November 2, 2008

the sun is just too shy today

This weekend, I think will appear to be a though week. I just finished this the first day of whole week fall intensive class on Global cooperation, major in energy policy. The class starts at 10 and ends at 4. And the proffessor is just though. The thoughest I ever see so far. God.. I think I just have to work harder. Yeah.. at least for this week only. One thing though, while we are talking about energy efficiency and some sort of, the classroom is soooo not likely to imply that topic. You know why? because in this freezing autumn, the class is colder than outside the building! huuuahahaahahaha... they still turn on the air con. Just like the bus I ride yesterday.

Talking about paradox, there is one more. My professor said that mailing list helps to establish your network and get all sort of information that you actually need in time. But then again, it really doesnt apply to me. Am I the one who feel weird in this case? Cuz here`s the deal. Just moments ago, I realized how messy and unorganized my email is. Tooo many unread email. Then I realized that many of those emails came from all that mailing lists that I join volunterarily. At the end, I just read the title, check all those unread email, and delete it. Without even bothering whether they have something important or not. At the end, this mailing lists system is really a pain in my head. Have to figure out how to use them properly. Got to be sooner, I guess..

While messing myself with deleting all those email, a friend sent me a nice writing by George Carlin. Ahh.. if you ask me who this person is, you wont get anything. Anyway.. George Carlin wrote something interesting stuff though. I`ll quote it here

*******

A Message by George Carlin:

The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but shorter tempers, wider Freeways , but narrower viewpoints. We spend more, but have less, we buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgement, more experts, yet more problems, more medicine, but less wellness.

We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.

We've learned how to make a living, but not a life. We've added years to life not life to years. We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbour. We conquered outer space but not inner space. We've done larger things, but not better things.

So...

Remember; spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever.

Remember, say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave your side.

Remember, to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is the only treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn't cost a cent.

Give time to love, give time to speak! And give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind.

AND ALWAYS REMEMBER:

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

******

While reading this, I realized that Iget used to stay up really late for the past couple of years. Then sometimes, I wake up too tired that I almost hate to drag myself out of bed in the morning. I guess.. no wonder if I fall for the warmth of autumn sunshine. Its sooo warm that I almost unable to do anything else than embrace it in front of my window. Just a couple of minutes, though.. coz I have to hurry to school. But today, the sun is too shy that it let the cloud to do the job of coloring the sky with its plain white turns to grey color. So, to make it colorful, I just turn on my IPod and listen to some colorful music along the way. So, reminds me to give one nobel price to Ipod inventer later the days. Just in case I forget it...

Good day everyone ^_^

originally written on November 3, 2008

Obama wins and the fact that MacBook hates school

The topic of the day is none other than US Presidential election 2008. There was no single thought in my mind that my usually-boring global cooperation class turns into a lively class today. The professor suddenly halt the class every 45 minutes just to update the result of the election. And suprisingly, every one in the class seems to be very excited to know whether Obama will become US president or not. We are kinna Obama`s fans all of a sudden. Even the professor made a joke. He said that if Obama wins, he will get drunk but with champagne. But if McCain wins, local beer is enough. The serious professor is not that serious! This is amazing, really.

Obama histeria is really everywhere. Not in US, oh i wont complaint on this, or Japan or my beloved country, Indonesia. When I read local website in Indonesia, it said that students at Menteng elementary school where Obama used to study hundreds years ago i guess, celebrated the win as well. Wow.. isn`t that surprising? I actually never understand the whole US election system, let alone to understand double system of electoral votes and popular votes. But these kids actually hold Obama`s picture in their hands celebrating his wins. If my memory serves me right, there was no such histeria when Susilo Bambang Yudhoyono was elected as a president 4 years back. And to keep in mind, he is INDONESIA`s president! even one of Indonesia`s biggest news station never in history broadcasted US party convention. Yet, it broadcasted LIVE Democratic Party National Convention when Obama gave his moving speech. Something that this news station never did when it comes to its own country`s presidential election. But waaiitt.... we don`t have good presidential debate, let alone party convention. Amazing!! I guess.. I will just suggest Indonesia to cancel the 2009 election because we can start thinking that Obama is our president. Yay!!

And another striking fact that appear in my life today is that my macbook is really not the weird one. When the professor made presentation explaining nuclear policy in France, his macbook Pro started doing rebel movement too. It kept refusing to appear in presentation mode. or in another word, it just came back to its original PDF version. He even cannot register this fact into his mind. Well professor.. you have the same fate with me. My beautiful white macbook did the same thing too. Everytime I brought it to school, it suddenly turn into hot mode and became soooo noicy. The noice hung like a bee. Gosh..it was really bad. I felt like it really unhappy to be in the school for any reason. Yeaahh... I guess, macbook hates school anyway. so, from now on I have to use school computer then. Its free and social anyway. hehehehehee...

OK...Its time to go to Obama`s party then.. ^_^

originally written on November 5, 2008

How the world seems to be so different in just two days?

I still remember the massive histeria and joy that Obama brought with his presidential victory. Clueless in japanese language, I only understand the people`s cheerful expression on television. All I feel and understand is the happiness that spread out only by this one man winning election. It seems that everything is less important nowadays. People seems to be so energized with the new hope that comes with a new president. A president who repeatedly spread the message of "YES, WE CAN" and "MARCHING TO THE FUTURE". Such a positive aura... even myself can`t help not to deliver the same message and encouragement to a good friend who wil have his thesis presentation next week.

But why things can be so different today? Why the positive aura was no longer around just a second I enter the World Press Photo Exhibition 2008 in Rits Kyoto Peace Museum? In the exhibition, there are numbers of photos from world reknown photographer that has received prizes in different catagories. But the message is the same, "there are more death and suffer in this world than we expect before". There are mostly pictures of wars - Israel-palestine war, afghan war, sudan war, iraqi war- you name it! Not to mention local conflict in zimbabwe, kenya, and sooo many more that my brain decided not to register them for longer than 5 seconds. The more I see them, the more I realize that most pictures have people in it. Dead, wounded, run, frighted, scary people. People who seems to have no hope to life. There are also pictures about people who fight for their life in no-hope condition. But there are also pictures of the David. The powerful man. The man and woman in guns. People who can take lives of other in a matter of seconds. Yet, there was a man who won a prize for his picture a baby in africa who was laid in a middle of nowhere with hawks waiting so patient beside only to eat him. The man did nothing and later killed himself for not doing anything about the baby.

What haunted me the most is a picture about Kenya post-election conflict in January 2008. A few days ago, my very own best friend pledged for God`s mercy not to have her beloved one went to Kenya to work. She said, there were almost no decent food there. Its all in ruin. Nairobi turned into ashes. At that time, I was clueless in what she was saying. I tried to look at the internet. But fool me.. I find nothing but a news about the unrest after presidential election. I told her to calm down. Now.. after seeing a picture of 80-years old lady carried her own cat - the only belonging she has left - on the street of nairobi, I finally realize how bad it must be there. How hard it must be to let the one we love with all our heart to live in such a condition. The pictures just say.. It is days of living dangerously.

It is so ironic compare those pictures to all pictures shown during my global cooperation class. All of them are pictures on energy, renewable energy, nuclear energy, big cities, vast lighting, big cities, amazing energy-efficient building. But there is one thing missing from most of the pictures. PEOPLE! Yes.. people is vanishing in peaceful pictures. We are gone.. In another part of the world where peace is around and joyful life is present, people seems to become less significant.

How come people seems to be so important only in pictures while their life are actually worthless in real? Then how come people who is regarded so high in a peaceful part of the world eventually missing in pictures?

Came to think about it, I guess my mind just ruin in shambles. The more I try to understand, the more I get confuse. When I think that the idea of pacifism and cosmopolitan democracy - thanks to my sensei who gave an assignment to read David Held`s theory of democracy and world order, the world seems more hopeful. The happiness for all. But it is a utopia, right? The world seems to be divided into two afterall. Today and after.

Then I remember that everything in the world is always at balance. Ying and Yang, thay call it in Chinese wisdom. Man and Woman, Male and Female, Son and daugter, two pairs of eyes, two legs, two hands. So, can I make a premise that "whether there is a peace in several place, there will be war in others?" Can we have only peace? Like one nose, one mouth, one heart, and only one life. Now.. I guess I understand why the world can be so different in just two days. Because there is a balance. A balance that I never really understand when it comes to peace and war..

Originally written on November 6, 2008

no title

I wish.. but this is a forbidden wish.
I hope..but this is an empty hope.
I dream.. but this is an endless dream.
But then again, why am I still talking to myself?


Yet...

I want to love you simple
with words that wood hasn`t able to said to the fire that turned it into ashes
I want to love you simple
with messages that cloud hasn`t able to whisper to the rain that made it vanishes

I just wish to love you simple
like the dim light of candle in the corner of ther room
It is dim.. yet I hope it is enough to be a sunshine in your heart and your life

originally written on November 7, 2008

How much social network is enough

One day, i sit with my dad enjoying evening breeze while reading a newspaper with a cup of tea and our all-time fave snack, pisang goreng aka fried banana. Then I read an interesting, if not cynical, article. The title is "how much mall is enough?" the article cynically portray the urban paradox in Jakarta where big super mall are being built like mushroom while no one believes that Indonesia is no longer in the state of crisis. No one really have high purchasing ability, except for the haves, less than 20 % of the whole 220 millions population. Who would buy all those stuff in the mall? how much mall is enough???

The same irony strike me tonight when i tried to clean all my emails from junk, spam and unread mails. I found myself in big troubles as many of those unread emails are important mails. left untouched for weeks, even months! many of them, importantly, need my reply. Ooohh.. for my friends and colleagues who sent me mails, and haven't receive any reply from me, please forgive me... i will try my best to make it up for you guys in the future...

As i getting through all the clean up, i found that many mails are truly junk!! many of them no more than notifications from all social network that i subscribe to. Yes, people.. you are so not wrong. social network..

My God, i never realized that i subscribe so many of them. facebook, friendster, plurk, hi5, xing, diino, twitter (oh, i just delete my account), and many more. not to mention the blogging stuff, livejournal, blogger, bloggaul... and my biggest guilty pleasure. tv-drama related forums.. geeezzz.. i cannot even mention each one of them as i apply so many of them. And too bad, none of those accounts are deletable!

so, i start asking myself... how much social network i actually need? if each social network represent my certain interest, how many things that actually, really interest me? do i start to have this multiple personality? (ooh.. i know i am taking things to far for this one ;p)

How many social network is enough?

Is our life getting so complicated that we need more than 1 social network or blog to stay in touch and express our self?

how many of us actually live that world and choose to live that way as it is more exiting than meeting the real people?

does having all these network is fulfilling?

or this multiple network is just a trend? a social trend that will continue to evolve as the world continue to revolve..

quoting a song, "somewhere that only we know"

originally written on August 1

There is a reason why we met someone

I just finished my tour in Himeji Castle. In freaking hot weather, took a break and had some drinks would be the best choice for avoiding any possibilities of dying from dehydration. While enjoying my ice cream, i suddenly heard somebody played a song. So familiar that I quicky knew that the song is called "Bengawan Solo", a very popular song composed by Gesang. A song that tells the story about Bengawan Solo, a river so famous in my hometown. And it is Solo, my hometown.

I finished my last bite quickly and run toward the man playing the song with his flute. I was standing 10 meters from him, watching him playing the flute and enjoying the melody. It was close to tear for me to hear that song in Japanese soil. the first time for me.. and he played it beautifully.

I thanked him for playing the song, a song that reminds me much of my hometown. He sounds so surprise then he asked about where is my hometown. I said, my hometown is Solo, a small city where the river lies and was named after. It was somehow a surpise for him. He actually never knew that Solo is the name of a city . He only know the song from YouTube and played it that day. I was then the one taken by surprise knowing that a man who knew nothing about my hometown could play that song so beautifully.

In my mind, there might be just simple reason why we met. For him, it might be about learning about Solo. And for me, it might be about healing the pain from missing my hometown so much. As simple as that...

But no matter what, I knew our path has crossed. But sadly it might well be that we would never meet again. Yet, I will always thankful for meeting him that day. He made me realize that my hometown is indeed lies in my heart. That even know in Japan, I can called a place where I live, "home".


I've heard it said, that people come into our lives for a reason
Bringing something we must learn
And we are led, to those who help us most to grow
If we let them, and we help them in return


p.s.
To you who played the song so beautifully, I thank you

originally written on August 4

Spring came too soon

A little girl asked me
"What is your favorite color?"

I smiled and said
"pink..."

and the little girl cheerfully replied
"You should come to Saijo on spring then..
That is the time when the sky turn pink and purple during sunset"

I had nothing to say to her
Yet, my heart had gave me an answer
"I wish spring come later..
if so, i would still have time to go to Saijo after I bid him goodbye.."

Spring came too soon

A little girl asked me
"What is your favorite color?"

I smiled and said
"pink..."

and the little girl cheerfully replied
"You should come to Saijo on spring then..
That is the time when the sky turn pink and purple during sunset"

I had nothing to say to her
Yet, my heart had gave me an answer
"I wish spring come later..
if so, i would still have time to go to Saijo after I bid him goodbye.."

Installing a husband

Dear Tech Support ,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0 .

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as:
· Romance 9.5 and
· Personal Attention 6.5,

and then installed undesirable programs such as :
· FOOTBALL 8.0 and
· GOLF CLUBS 4.1.1 ..

Also Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system.

· Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.

What can I do?

Signed,
Desperate.




DEAR DESPERATE ,

First, keep in mind,
· Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while
· Husband 1.0 is an operating system.

Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme.html and try to download Tears 6.2 and do not forget to install the Guilt 3.1.0 update.
· If that application works as designed,Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.

However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1 ..

· Please note that Beer 6.. 1 is a very bad program that will download the Farting and Snoring Loudly Trojan

Whatever you do, DO NOT under any circumstances install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources..)

In addition, please do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0 .

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend
· Cooking 3.0 and
· Hot Lingerie 7.7.

Good Luck!
Tech Support



*thanks to a friend who sent this to my mail. This joke really cracks me up! waakakakaka... *

universe

On this road where our dreams were shattered
and our ways parted
I remember your smile, your eyes, your light
I remember that whenever I was with you, I was complete

But for now, it is goodbye
Hope not for long..
Coz I will always want to be with you

I am the morning sun to greet you when you open your eyes
I am the blue noon sky that smiles to cheer up your day
I am the orange evening sunset to tell you to rest your day
I am your night sky to wrap you in your night sleep

Yet you...
You are not only my sunrise, my sunset, my sky or my star

You are my south, my north, my east, my west
My weekdays' work and my weekend's rest
My morning sun and my night stars
My reality and my dream, my talk and my song
You are my universe

So, goodbye for now
I'm leaving but never leave your side
Just whisper my name
And I will be there again


inspired by a story behind "okuribi" and crystal kay's "kaerimichi"

Life only want me to love you

I love you even before I knew you
I love you the moment I met you
I love you the day you say my name
I love you the minutes you smile to me
I love you the second I see your eyes
I love you when you speak to me
I love you when you sit silently next to me
I love you even now, when you're gone

Should have walked away cause i know we can never be together
Should have known that I cannot keep this love any longer
Should have realized that we are not meant to be

But I always want you to want me, even in my dreams

Yet, life never wants you to want me
Maybe life wants me only to love you
Maybe heaven sent me only to love you
Maybe that's the purpose of me in your life and you in my life
For me to love you


inspired by "Koizora, the movie" and "L-O-V-E"

why do we become stranger

It felt like we never talk to each other
It felt like we never had fun conversation over the phone
It felt like never shared laughter and funny jokes
It felt like we never told each other to keep the deep dark secret
It felt like we never share a glance of which meaning is only us know what
It even felt like you never been in my life

Please tell me
Why do we become stranger as we are today?

Wish we can go back to our good old days
Wish we can be good friend again
Wish you can come back into my life again

I miss you
Do you miss me too?

How it used to be

I used to talk to you in the morning
I used to talk to you at noon
I used to talk to you in the evening
I used to talk to you way into the night
I used to talk to you..


I used to sing "I knew I loved you"
I used to sing "Can I walk with you"
I used to sing "どうして君を好きになってしまったんだろう？"
I used to sing "Aishiteru"
I used to sing for you..


One day, you bid me silent goodbye
And suddenly walked away


All I can think of is that...

I am thankful that I used to know you
I am thankful that I used to talk to you
I am thankful that I used to think about you
I am thankful that I used to sing for you


Dear one,
I am sorry for the thing I never do
I am sorry for the words I never say
It might be just how it supposed to be


Now, that you are coming back
I am sorry for not having my world re-open for you
I want to open the door.. I want to open the window
But I lost the key..